~复杂的心情~

心情超级复杂，做任何东西我都好像心不在焉，我常常问自己这是我真的想要过的生活吗？在城市赚钱，要承受压力，要面对难堪的脸色，要做自己不太喜欢的工作，要和不喜欢的人迎面而笑， 一切都变得虚伪。几乎每个人都过着这样的生活，为了生计而做些违背良心的事情。我越来越没有办法适应这样的生活，一切的东西只让我觉得恶心。是我太单纯了还是这个世界的人变本加厉，让我透不过气。我曾以为我真的很现实，朋友都说我现实，可是我现在真的觉得现实太可怕了，我一点都不想变成现实的人，让我可以做回我真心想要做的东西，真心的快乐，我就心存感激了。这两天的假期把我的心情复杂化，这种感觉真的很不好受。如我乐观的想，应该会过得好吧！希望可以得到一些启发让我把心情简化，重新认识这个现实社会！

~Lost My WaY~

it's been 5 months since I've graduated. The job where i worked on now was my second job, but until now, i didn't really like it much. When i knew i got this job offered by this company, i'm very happy and felt so lucky can work in advertising firm. But this feeling gone when i step into this company in second week. Everything is not what i thought, of cause i know thought and reality is different things and this made me sometime really feel depress, sad and wanna run away from this company. I always told myself, what i have facing now actually will last only short moment, everything will going fine once i have adapt in that environment, and also try to think about the others who are business failure or get set by the company, those people will face much more problem than me. My case only a little matter, alway try to compare with other failure, then i'll feel better in such way. how failure am i. I always thinking i can only patience for a year, then i gonna change my plan, feel suffered when thinking want to go back that suck place.

~ComPLicateD~

Being insomnia few days, nop is few weeks....i don't know why but may be because of getting grew up, human will have many things to think of....life, job, relationship, health, future and so on........i think no one can escape this. Yesterday 28th September 2009, i got a call from ADL Advertising and Design Sdn Bhd, she said i got a job offered and need to work tomorrow because there was another staff will leave soon, so i gonna take over her jobs. When i heard that, i'm kinda happy because i didnt expect that i can get this job easily and it was just happened so quickly where i had interview with this company last thursday. Anyway, everything seem going smoothly, but there are other things bear in my mind, will this job suit me? how my advertising agency job? how was my planning to work in Singapore? That's why i always said human will not satisfied with the condition they are in. Every moment also need to use our brain to plan, to think where it is nonstop. There are many people also told me not to think too much just let it be.....but somehow everything is not under our control if we are not pay any effort to work it out, it is always the thing that we blame off. Ish.....i do hope my mind can rest for while without thinking anything which will not make thins complicated.

~What's Next~

Kinda frustrated, if i didnt make such decision supposingly i am still working now , make cold call and look for customers now. Even though i've feel a bit upset but i dont feel regret, once i made this decision, it do really make me relief. There are different reasons made me to left my Ex company. Now, i'm became unemployed. I'm still looking forward interested job but on the way looking for job and i've got some truth which "DREAM" and "REALITY" doesnt be in the same line. If you interested in particular job doesnt meant you can successfully get the job . Once you have been hire, it doesnt meant you can perform well in your job without qualification or experience. But there's one thing always bear in my mind where if you never try you will never know what's the level you are in. People will never know what's their qualification or capability until they are really involve in the job, hence, time for adaption as well as willingness to learn is very important step to achieve success. Currently, i learn some graphic work in order to help in promoting handmade craft of my mum, make cold call to approach customers to advertise in Red Tomato (Worked as agent in RedTomato), looking for part time as well as full time job. What's the next? For this moment, i;m not sure what i actually want and need, all i desired actually not what i really need and want once i really got in touch with it. So, really need some time to explore what i want, perhaps it is not a long period on the way searching wat i do need. I really thanks for Red Tomato -ex company giving me much opportunity to learn although i have waste their time by decided to turn in resignation letter but they still offered me worked as agent....really appreciated. Thanks and i promised i'll be more strong in the future.

~NeW Lif3~

being busy for few weeks, finally tis week gotta relax and get prepare for my very first permanant job. Since finished my final exam, i am seraching for job and attended couple times of interview, every time also make me dissappointed. during these 3 months, i have wait for the call for attend interview and wait for the call for the part time job offered. i have worked four parttime jobs while i'm waiting for the permanant job offer. Finally, i got a job.....actually i got this job easily, because this company hire fresh graduate, of coz i can get this job on the spot without waiting for their comfirmation. my new company located at taman desa which near by old klang road. It is called TALENT PLUS where its only product is chinese free press called red tomato.....anyway i do hope i can have a good career in this company.........other than that, i've experience in doing sales in various roadshow, it really improve my confident to talk to different level of people, i believe it do help my career!!!!!hope everything going smoothly............

~MONEY make Complicat3d~

Life getting complicated. A fresh Degree holder in panic now!!!no income, no job and keep waiting for the call to attend interview, i'm really get bored with this kind of life...a Q always came in my mind, "WHAT I WANT?". i thought i'm clear with what i want before graduate, i planned well what i wan to achieve, i know exactly what my dreams, i know what i would like to be but all of these thought disappear after i get free from my study life. I totally LOST....i'm thinking a lot nonsense, i'm thinking why many people couldn't get what they want, why they not fight to the end to get and achieve what they want, and why people control by the cruel reality!!!!Finally i got the answer, everything is because of MONEY......without money, we doing nothing. without money, we can't even success. Without money, without dreams.....Money make people become complicated, make the world become complicated. Money made dirty mind.....SHIT.......why not people survive without money......how to make people to restructure the perception of money? money is really everything? i hope i can find the answer very soon!!!!!!!!!!!

~我很烦恼~

毕业旅行回来了， 还真的有点不适应KL的生活了，只是段段的四天在PERHENTIAN ISLAND，　我却已经爱上那个地方了，比起去年，我确定我更爱它了！那里的清静，永远都和ＫＬ比较不了。每个住在岛上的人都有一种说不出来的亲切，他们对游客的亲切和礼貌足以让游客喜欢上这个岛的欢乐！听早晨的海浪声让我觉得又是一个美好的一天，每个人住在这个岛都没有烦恼，没有竞争，没有压力， 这都是我们会爱上它的原因！回来差不多一个星期多了，几乎每晚都在哭，想念的感觉从来没有停止，我又好像回到过去般地想念它， 应该会有好一段日子才能恢复心情。有朋友的感觉真好，朋友的喧闹让我觉得我确确实实生活在这个残酷的生活里头， 可是每当夜晚却又开始想念这个岛所发生的事情， 脑海有股冲动的想要在那里定居， 做我喜欢做的事情。如果我只是一个人，一切都容易得多，往往很多事情都不是如愿以偿的，现实总是围绕在我们的身边， 时时刻刻提醒着我们应该做些什么和不应该做些什么！我真的很烦恼！我似乎越来越没有信心去做些我想要做的事情，现实叫我不能再做些不切实际的事情！现在是非常时期，我真的没有把握我现在做的事情都是对的！虽然我们都不知道未来会发生些什么事情！可是每当坐一个决定，他都回引导你未来要走的路，我能不谨慎吗！希望一切都可以掌握之中